We take so many backwards. This is a vicious cycle. I feel like I'm on a roller coaster. That's it, it's like being on one of those hideous rides at the fair that goes sideways, upside down and loops around and you want to get off as soon as it starts but you really can't and you know it. Mind you.... I don't like those rides and don't get on in the first place!
For anyone who knows me, I'm snappy, sarcastic and I don't take stuff from people. I'm a very personable person, don't get me wrong.....but I just lay it out there. I'm very honest and open I guess you'd say. However this experience with my son has humbled me I'd like to think. I'm still sarcastic, yes (I can hear my friends reading this now....) but now my main response to everything is just grow up.
So back to my point, I'm getting a little off track and when I explain you will know why. The new medicine isn't working either. Today is only day 2 and it has made him sick. We had a Dr' s appointment this morning in Greenville, NC and saw the Social Worker that we've been seeing for months now. I told her what we've been doing and trying. She wasn't happy with the new med they just put him on. I thought GREAT, what am I supposed to do now? So I take him back on Monday morning, bright and early. Mind you I got up late this morning, drove in the pouring rain, but she got to experience what we've been experiencing.....
Thomas is now chatty, no not just chatty, he is talking non stop and stuttering. He then flips and says Don't talk to me, Don't look at me and then the next thing you know he's screaming, yelling or crying. Talk about frustrating. So this morning he had no contact with her at all, but talked constantly to me about everything under the sun. All the way home he talked and talked and talked until he got sick about a mile from home. He hadn't eaten anything at all and took the medicine on an empty stomach.
He's refusing to eat more often than he's eating. He has trouble sleeping and if any of you are on my facebook page.... you know we lost his My My Mommy. This would be his blanket. It's gone and we've torn apart two houses looking for it. It is just pieces of a blanket now that we've knotted together, but none the less it's gone! We've asked him numerous times where he put it, did he throw it somewhere and he has no recollection of where it could be.
I'm exhausted, my husband is tired and he works constantly and is rarely home. I work part time and am working hard to get a certification that I've wanted for years! It's hard to explain this to family and friends and have them truly understand what is going on or what we need help with. Right now I just need support, friends and lots of encouragement because when I step forward I constantly have one foot lingering behind somewhere
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