It Matters

Some things just matter and no matter how hard we try to forget or we try to erase the hurt, pain or the memory, it matters. It may not matter to anyone else, but it matters to us. We are all entitled to our feelings, opinions and so forth. Again, I say that it may not matter to anyone else, but it could matter to you!

On Saturday we had a wonderful turn out for the Run/Walk for Autism. 24 wonderful, dedicated people left their homes and came to join us in honor of Thomas. It was very emotional and very wonderful to see these kind hearted people show up and support him, support us and love him! It mattered to them to be there and they proved that. We had children walking with us, even a few that walked the whole way. Thomas' older brother ran the entire 5K! I was so proud of him. On the flip side of that, there were a few people who had said over and over how much this meant to them and how much Thomas means to them but they didn't show up. They really proved to us that perhaps this doesn't mean as much to them as they had proclaimed some months earlier and that Thomas and Autism doesn't mean that much to them after all. What a saddening feeling I had that day to really feel that for him. What an eye opener as well, it has nothing to do with me, but this little boy who cannot speak for himself and whether or not he will or may ever know if you were there.... it has nothing to do with that. Someone said that they would show up, said they would be there and that this was "their thing, their platform, they were excited..." then nothing on the day of the actual walk. I'm sad for Thomas because he will have to encounter people in his life who may build up his hopes and then tear them down and it's my job to teach him to be able to deal with that.... you would think that people who claim to love him wouldn't do that to him at 4 years old. I'm very saddened and very hurt for him. It matters.

We raised over $5,000 by the end of Saturday for Team Thomas and while we were not the team with the  most money raised, we did very well. We had lots of people to give money that day, we had some late comers to sign up and walk with us and somehow some of the workers from the Autism Society had heard about Team Thomas.... so it matters. That matters a lot. That money will be used for so many good things. It will be used to help someone who needs therapy, whose insurance won't pay, and so many other things for children and adults with Autism. To learn more you can visit the Autism Society of NC's website and read more.

So many things are happening in our little corner of the world. It seems that good friends are hard to find, things are always happening, something always needs to be done, kids are going here and there, someone always has something to say. In reality the only thing that matters is making it through the day in one piece and worrying about what God has to say. His opinion matters and no one else's. I've been thinking about writing some of this into a book, have no idea where to start, or end. Is this the life I would have chosen for us? Probably not. Would I trade this life with anyone else? Not for anything else in this world! Each day matters to me in some form or another and when I hear someone say "I'm glad it's you and not me", I'm glad it's me too!